Jedi Holiday Videos
Contributed by Andromeda
Published 12/4/99
Running on every channel on every planet in the galaxy during every holiday season ...
"It's a Wonderful Jedi Life"
Fed up with the Council, etc., Qui-Gon is about to throw himself on Maul's saber when an
angel named Clarence shows him what things would've been like if he'd never been born:
Obi-Wan would've been sent to AgriCorps, running away to become a juvenile delinquent, and
the Jedi Council would have died of boredom. Qui-Gon ends up running through Theed wishing
everyone a Merry Christmas, while Yoda reminds everyone, "Every time a bell rings,
gets his wings an angel does." Not a bad movie, but the Jedi Channel runs it to death
every year.
"Merry Christmas, Qui-Gon Jinn"
Qui-Gon struggles with the materialism of the holidays, while Yoda busily decorates his
house to try to win a prize. Sent to get a Christmas tree, Qui-Gon returns with the
sorriest specimen on Coruscant. Obi-Wan: "I see we've acquired yet another pathetic
lifeform." Qui-Gon: "I had to, Padawan. This little tree needs me."
"How Darth Sidious Stole Christmas"
Darth Sidious tries to steal Christmas, strapping an antler to Darth Maul's head and
hitching him up to a sleigh.
(Andromeda lives in
Portland, Oregon, with her husband and three cats. She writes "Phantom Menace"
fanfic as a creative escape from her job at a bank.)